Erin Kalowski/Travelling Merchant

'It's a life lesson, Meatball. Everybody is an idiot - I'm a prime example.'




Fourty, probably ‘cause I’m inna givin’ mood today. Hey, tell ya what - I gotta bottle here that’s leaked like a mother, and there’s only, what, half lef’? D’you want it fer free?

If you really don’t want it, sure. Thanks.

So fourty caps… there you go. Now, do you have any Stealth Boys? Stims? In fact — is there anything that you need? I have plenty of chems — too many, actually. I synthed them myself, so you shouldn’t worry about whether they’re safe or not. Just a proposal. 

Well, if ya want… lessee here, a Stealth Boy is 120, and Stims are 25… so… Ten Med-X, Jet, Buffout, RadAway and whatever should ‘bout cover it. Most chems cost ‘round 20 caps, anyways. What d’ya say?                           

Yes, I can spare that. As I said. And I should just reaffirm: the chems I’m about to trade with you aren’t the actual things - you know, that you can find out in the hospitals - but they’re basically the same. I can give you six of my Med-X and four buffout - they’re in Rad-X bottles, but they are anabolic steriods.

Hand over the Stealth boy and Stims now, would you?

Geeze, gettin’ a lil’ demanding, aren’t we? You know what they say, good things come to those who wait… or something. ‘S not a rule I follow, personally. Also… these things are homemade, I’m assumin’? Not bad, not bad at all. Once I sell ‘em, they can’t back out anyway. I’ll just ‘ave ta change the Rad-X bottles, course… don’t wan’ any nasty accidents. Bad business, and we’ll ‘ave none o’ that here at Kalowski Caravans, eh, Meatball? Oh, sorry. Customer, Meatball. Meatball, customer. ‘E’s my long time pal.

Okay, one Stealth Boy and three Stims… don’t use ‘em all at once, ‘kay?